Have you ever been with a person that exhausts you? Figuring out who's to blame is really no help. For better or worse, if you've found someone that isn't a match to your energy, being with them can feel like you're sticking a pencil in a fan. What do you do?
If they're a chance aquaintance, the course of action is obvious. You say "Very nice to have met you." and off you go. If they're a business associate or client or a family member or lover, well, that takes a bit more thought.
Hanging on to client or a job that grates on you may seem like good business sense, a kind of tip of the hat to staying the course or toughing it out. After all, you're getting paid, right? What you may not consider is that you pay, too. Your energy takes a nose dive, your mood swings, and the next client that comes along doesn't get your best self but a drained and cranky version of you.
Your job is something you do most of your waking hours. Being miserable on the job is too high a price to pay for a little security. A happy life should be more than just something you dream about.
An energy vampire family member is a trickier problem, but moving to another state can be a great solution. Really, though, the best approach is to get very practical and realistic. If you have to see this person, ask yourself, "How often can I see them and stay sane and balanced; one day or one hour a week, or month, or year? Only on the holidays? Every two centuries?" Figure that out and stick to your decision until the energy between the two of you gets more harmonious.
Giving yourself the power to choose when and how long you want to be with this person may help your relationship improve, or it may just get better as you both age and mellow. It may never change, but at least you've defined your boundaries, and that's a powerful act. You'll feel better for it.
If you have a lover that makes you tired I just have to ask: what are you thinking?!
Bottom line: Honor yourself and your feelings. Don't judge yourself, don't judge the other person, don't ask yourself the reason why. It doesn't matter why. The only thing that matters is how YOU feel. Take yourself seriously. Trust yourself. It 's a sure-fire path to being happy.
Finding Method in the Madness:
