How sticky my emotions can be. Sometimes one jolt to my ego takes me all day to recover from. I'm very stubborn that way.
On the plus side, something good happening can keep me walking on air. When I feel my feet start to touch the ground just remembering a lovely event can get me floating again.
But both these moods are created externally. They both require words of blame or praise from another person. How I would love it if I were strong enough to create my own mood from within and live in that without regard to what someone else thinks or does.
I guess that's the ultimate goal for me for this year. It's why I'm writing this blog, really, to clarify what I'm thinking, why I'm thinking it, and if what I'm thinking serves me or not. Depending on other people to cheer me up or noticing that they bring me down does not serve me. How do I get over this?
Letting go is a good start. I've learned that other people's opinions are really a reflection of their own perspective in life and have no relation, really, to who I am. Good or bad, letting go of the effect someone's opinion has on my day is a very good plan.
When I was younger, I tried my best to get along with everyone. Like a chamelion, I changed my opinions, way of speaking, ideas, and sense of self in order to blend in with whatever group I was with. What a messy way to be, especially when diverse groups would get together. Oh, the headaches I would get.
I no longer do that. I have a strong appreciation for who I am and what I do, but I still let others get to me if I'm not feeling my best. I think just noticing the problem is a good start to solving it. Also, accepting that I'm not at my best, and therefore vulnerable, is a way towards healing.
I'm human. I have good days and bad, sick days and well. All sorts of unexpected events can come into my life and change me for good or ill. What I want to feel is happy. That's my aim.
I'm going to relax, be where I am, and let go of anything that distracts me from hitting my target emotion.
Ahhhhh!
Finding Method in the Madness:
